Friday, April 4, 2008

Asta Marie on Marriage and Husbands

After my Middle Name Meme posting, I got a few comments requesting more information on my marriages. It has been some time now since all this occurred, but I will let you get a glimpse of my life for the past few years.

I guess I misspoke earlier when I said that I had two husbands since I actually had three husbands. The first one was so forgettable, that I simply forgot about him.

Where shall I start?
When I was 2, my Mom decided that she wanted to have some grandchildren………lord knows that her hooman kids weren’t giving her any. And so we needed to find a suitable husband for me. That was a job as Mom did now show me….the vet butchered my tail when I was 3 days old and there was no getting it back. We found a prospective suitor in nearby Ohio and Mom took me down for the canoodling. Here is a photo of Buckshot, husband #1, that showed his best side. I want to tell you that when I went down there to meet him, he looked like a sheep about to be shorn. Mom never took a picture of what he looked like then.

We canoodled twice but I didn’t get any puppies….most likely because of all that hair…but that's only my theory……

By the time I was in season again, Buckshot had moved on and I was introduced to Willie. Here’s Willie…not a bad lookin fellow….nicely groomed…but I didn’t KNOW him. Who wants to doink someone that you just met? I tried to bite him, his Mom, his Dad, my Mom and anyone else that was around. However, he had his WAY with me twice and I had 3 puppies.

I won’t go into what all happened because it was pretty tragic but I lost 2 of my puppies, the 2 boys and only the girl was left...... my sweet Abby. Here’s Abby then ......

And here's Abby now.


My Mom understood that I was just not into casual sex and the next time she was ready for puppies, she brought Fred home for my big bruver Scott. Now look at that face, would ya? Wouldn’t you just swoon and melt after lookin into those eyes?
She didn’t have to coax me into canoodling with Fred and we had 4 puppies, all boys, on Halloween in 2006. I had problems with both of my deliveries and my Mom had the fix-it surgery when they delivered the 4 boys. Here I am after getting home from the vets. Do I look sick or what?

But my Mom is happy with Dewey (while I wish he would have found a new home). She says he is so much like me, it is scary. So while I did just love all of my babies, I wasn’t crazy about all of my husbands. And it is good that I don’t have to worry about taking care of any more kids, just my Mom. And my Mom is happy because she was afraid that she was going to lose me with all of the problems that I had.

So that’s the story of my three husbands and all of my kids.


12 comments:

Noah the Airedale said...

G'day Asta Marie,
We're sorry you had complications with the births. Thank dogness you're ok now. Thanks for telling us all about your 3 ex husbands. Fred sure was a cutie.
Tess has had 2 husbands herself but she doesn't speak of them. The rest of us have never been married.

Hugs and tail wags
Noah Willow Tess & Lucy

Momo & Pinot said...

Hello Asta Marie!
We had no idea you had three husbands! I, Momo is 2.5months old but I even don't have one yet! :)

Abby looks adorable!

Momo & Pinot

ps. We would love to add your names to our friends list. Hope it's ok with you guys.

William Tell said...

Canoodling? Here in Oklahoma, we have a fishing technique called "noodling", but I don't think it gets you any puppies...

Glad to hear that you are doing well now, and sorry you had such a hard time with the little ones. Motherhood doesn't sound like an easy thing to do.

Happy Tails,
William Tell

Koobuss said...

You have certainly had an interesting life, Asta Marie.
Having three ex-husbands is almost Hollywood-like. I am so impressed. And Fred, is gorgeous! No wonder you liked him the best.

I am going to remain a bachlorette. You don't have to worry about Dewey making you a grandma with me.
Hehehe.

Love and Koobuss Kisses,
Kobie

Eric said...

Hey Asta Marie,

You sure look like a yummy mummy...

Wiry wags,

Eric x

Sparky said...

Three husbands! Man, you must be pooped! Fred was certainly handsome.

I often wish I could marry my next door neighbor, Keda the Maltese. Unfortunately, when she found out I was neutered, she dumped me for 2 other Maltese dogs. Man, that just broke my heart.

Sparky

Dixie the Dog said...

Asta Marie, you sure are a strong doggie! Good for you. I loved the story about your husbands and children. Thanks for sharing!

Agatha and Archie said...

Oh my,that is a bit like Days of Our Lives!!!! We think Fred was yummy(well Agatha thinks yummy Archie thinks manly) Love A+A

Blue said...

Hi there!

I found you via Eric, & I soooo pleased I did.
That " husband " post of yours Asta Marie was sheer brillent.

So there is no confusion, I'm a human lady with a doggy fixation; who is particularly fond of WFT's.
As an only child my doggy sister Judy was a characterful one.
We share lots of DWB friends, so I hope you'll visit me, when you've a free mo.

Pats & pets to all
Blue

Scruffy, Lacie and Stanley's Place said...

Um...what's this bout Koobie and Dewey makin' u a Grandma???

Anyway, I have no idea why Mumsie is wipin' her eyes and have seizures on the floor, but I think it was the word "canoodling" or however ya spell it!!!

Great post Asta!!!!!!!!!

That last honey of yours sure is a cutie. Um...is that Dewey's Dad?

I get it...ur like his mom. I knew that.

Lacie; "Scruffy, sometimes you are so dumb it is just astonishing!!!"

Scruffy

Lenny said...

You do sound like a Hollywood starlet with all of those men in your life! Thanks for the juicy info! ;)

Your friend, Lenny

Jackson said...

Hey Asta, wow I never realised you were such a man-eater! I've never been married and I think I'm happy staying single! J x